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030215doirlily
6:14:12 PM GA: Dina hums contentedly as she builds fort punchbutt out of various containers and pillows next to her post-scratch base room. 6:14:39 PM GA: (She's totally humming the buy theme from the Sims 3.) 6:14:46 PM GT: You feel the hairs stand up on the back of your neck. Almost like someone's watching you. 6:15:15 PM GA: Dina stops and turns around quickly. 6:15:35 PM GA: She grabs her tiara and... powers it up? Puts it in boomerang mode? 6:15:59 PM GT: It's not immediately obvious that anyone's there. The hallway looks fairly empty at first glance. 6:16:13 PM GT: Then you notice the tip of a mint-green shoe poking out from behind a corner. 6:16:16 PM GA: (( dude this sims 3 buy mode totally ripped off the elf theme )) 6:16:22 PM GA: (( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDiXxyb5jUQ )) 6:17:29 PM GA: Dina shrugs and puts the finishing touches on her fort, then gets comfy inside. 6:18:27 PM GT: Some time passes without any incident. Then, about 5 minutes later, you hear footsteps, followed by a muffled rustling just outside your fort. 6:19:21 PM GA: A green ghost apparates in front of the intruder. "WHO DARES DISTURB FORT PUNCHBUTT?" 6:20:17 PM GT: Fort Punchbutt appears to have been disturbed by....Fort Punchbutt, as far as you can tell. Then again, you're pretty sure you didn't build this new bit sticking out on the side. 6:21:12 PM GA: "...huh?" Dina de-mindghostifies and stands up to get a better look. "what." 6:21:17 PM GT: Pretty neat work for such a quick build. Whoever made this must have a lot of experience making pillow forts. 6:21:44 PM GA: She starts captchaloguing her base. 6:21:53 PM GA: "pfah, all wrong now." 6:22:10 PM GA: Not taking her eyes off the extension. 6:22:12 PM GT: The extension rumbles in seeming offense to your comment. 6:23:04 PM GA: She leaves the extension alone, but starts pouring water or something on it. 6:23:39 PM GT: The quivering intensifies, but the extension holds firm. 6:24:19 PM GA: Dina shrugs again and floats away. 6:29:52 PM GT: There is a furious shuffling noise behind you. 6:30:35 PM GA: Dina looks back. 6:30:45 PM GT: Just the extension again. 6:30:48 PM GT: You think it's closer now. 6:30:55 PM GA: "are you really solid snaking me right now?" 6:31:10 PM GT: Indignant quivering. 6:31:42 PM GA: She goes back and stands above it. Then, turns around, puts her butt to it, and lets out a massive, disgusting fart. 6:32:10 PM GT: The extension stands firm. You think it might be mocking you. 6:32:17 PM GA: It smells like onion and banana. 6:33:38 PM GT: You can barely make out the faint sound of gagging coming from within. 6:34:14 PM GA: Dina takes out the superheated slicer. "hmm, i wonder how these pillows will fare against an axe dripping with... liquid... plasma okay that makes no sense at all but yeah" 6:34:30 PM GA: "its still got some burnt maenam arm on it cause i cant find a way to clean it" 6:35:16 PM GT: An ash-gray arm bursts through the pillows extended in an elegant gesture, then pops back inside. 6:36:11 PM GA: Dina says nothing and starts floating away again. 6:36:18 PM GA: Faster, this time. 6:36:33 PM GT: The shuffling increases in speed and volume. 6:37:42 PM GA: "i thought we had an unofficial restraining order." Dina doesn't stop or turn back. 6:38:43 PM GT: "Yeah, well, it doesn't count if the orderee repeals it," a familiar voice says from within the depths of pillowtown. "Which I'm not, by the way, because clearly you didn't listen to ANYTHING Sami said." 6:39:13 PM GA: She keeps going silently. 6:40:29 PM GT: "I know what you're trying to pull here, all right? I talked to your little buddies." 6:40:46 PM GA: No response. 6:41:00 PM GT: "And it's a stupid-ass strategy, and you need to STOP IT." 6:41:39 PM GA: Still none. 6:42:08 PM GT: The shuffling stops abruptly, replaced by hurried footsteps. 6:42:57 PM GA: Dina simply speeds up. 6:43:36 PM GT: Lily breaks out into a full-out run. "LOOK at me when I'm TALKING TO YOU, *DAD*!" 6:44:40 PM GA: She stops abruptly and turns. "what do you want? im not your father." 6:46:28 PM GA: She says it almost dejectedly, in complete monotone. 6:46:46 PM GT: Lily screeches to a halt. She's breathing heavily, face flushed with effort. Her face is contorted into an expression of purest rage, and...oh no. God damn it, she's crying again. Why does this always HAPPEN to you. 6:46:58 PM GT: "I said, LOOK at me," she snarls. 6:47:12 PM GA: Dina looks at her with boredom in her eyes. 6:49:28 PM GT: "I don't care if you've convinced yourself you don't care anymore. I DON'T BELIEVE THAT!" She paces forward menacingly. "LOOK ME IN THE EYES AND TELL ME IT'S BETTER THIS WAY! REALLY, LOOK ME IN THE EYES PROPERLY AND TELL ME THIS IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO!" 6:50:11 PM GA: Dina locks eyes with her and in complete monotone says, "its better this way. this is the right thing to do." 6:51:18 PM GT: "You're LYING," she hisses. 6:51:56 PM GT: "You're lying through your MOTHERFUCKING TEETH." 6:52:24 PM GA: "yes. i am lying. you got me." Dina deadpans. 6:54:28 PM GT: She charges at him, grabbing his shoulders and pushing him back against the wall. "STOP IT! STOP FUCKING PUSHING ME AWAY BECAUSE YOU'RE AFRAID TO CARE! JUST - *SNAP OUT OF IT*!" 6:55:01 PM GA: She lets herself be pushed. "okay." 6:56:12 PM GA: "i feel like you've improved." 6:56:40 PM GA: She sighs. "and again, im not afraid to care, seriously, why does everyone think that?" 6:57:00 PM GT: "Because you pull shit like THIS, you FUCKING IDIOT." 6:58:19 PM GA: "maybe im pretending not to care and to have regressed so that you'll find that ending it all really wouldn't solve anything for real." 6:58:27 PM GA: "boom." 6:58:54 PM GA: "ill have you know my talk with sami was very openly emotional." 6:59:08 PM GT: "If you were doing that, I would..." She takes several deep, calming breaths. "I don't know what I'd do." 6:59:59 PM GT: "You would seriously think that PUSHING ME AWAY was the right solution? HURTING ME MORE WOULD MAKE ME HURT LESS?" 7:00:39 PM GT: "Besides, you're not that good of an actor." 7:00:57 PM GA: "no, i was hoping youd realize that you are actively trying to help me and despite your screw ups you always attempt to do the right thing." 7:01:05 PM GA: "also, you completely believed me." 7:01:51 PM GT: She steps back, realization dawning. 7:02:06 PM GT: "You mean that was - this was all a ruse, a fucking RUSE?" 7:02:27 PM GA: "sure?" 7:02:35 PM GT: "I THOUGHT I'D BROKEN YOU SO MUCH YOU'D NEVER GET FIXED AGAIN, AND YOU *LET* ME THINK THAT." 7:02:46 PM GT: "BECAUSE IT WOULD HELP ME LEARN ~VALUABLE LIFE LESSONS~." 7:03:09 PM GA: "you thought that? jesus christ, sami made it sound like she thought id get better and you thought that too." 7:03:26 PM GA: "seriously nobody has any faith in me around here smh" 7:03:33 PM GT: "I didn't KNOW! I'd never SEEN you like that before. You just - you just SWITCHED OFF!" 7:03:55 PM GA: She shrugs. "yeah, im good at that." 7:04:32 PM GT: "YOU - " She stops. "No." 7:04:37 PM GT: "No, actually, this is GREAT." 7:04:53 PM GT: "You wanted me to hate you, right? That was the point of this little exercise?" 7:05:09 PM GA: "yeah basically" 7:05:16 PM GA: "cue you saying you still hate me, the fire is still burning" 7:05:17 PM GT: "Well, congratulations. It fucking WORKED." 7:05:33 PM GT: "AND YOU STILL DON'T FUCKING *CARE*!" 7:05:49 PM GA: "i do care, its just if i showed it you wouldnt hate me. duh." 7:06:01 PM GA: "hell, i only let you in on the ruse because itd infuriate you more." 7:06:32 PM GA: "and infuriatingly angry is better than dead because i couldnt stop you." 7:07:03 PM GT: Lily stands there, face reddening, looking for all the world like she's a volcano about to erupt. 7:07:17 PM GT: Then, just like that, it stops. 7:07:49 PM GT: "OK," she says calmly. "New plan." 7:08:09 PM GT: "Hating you solves nothing. It's just letting you win. It's what you want." 7:08:13 PM GA: "be calm and empty like me? fat chance, ive got a plan too." 7:08:25 PM GT: "So I'm not going to." 7:08:32 PM GT: "Though believe me, I want to." 7:08:46 PM GT: She grins. "I'm going to love you instead." 7:09:01 PM GA: "yeah this is even better" 7:09:48 PM GT: "SHUT U -" She quickly schools her face into a calm expression. "Yeah, I know, right? I'm the best at plans, it's me." 7:10:28 PM GT: "That pillow fort you were building looked cool. You wanna go put it back together?" 7:10:44 PM GT: "Me and Dad used to make pillow forts together like ALL THE TIME. I am practically a pillow ninja." 7:11:09 PM GT: "Also I'm a Junior Arbitrix now. Hope that's OK." 7:11:16 PM GT: "I'm collecting stabbing privileges." 7:11:32 PM GA: "listen, lily, thats great, but... im not your dad. im not erisio's dad. hell, im a lady right now." 7:11:47 PM GT: "So?" She shrugs. "Mom, then. Works for me." 7:12:07 PM GA: "no, thats not the point i was making. also, sounds weird, im much more dadly." 7:12:14 PM GT: "Yeah, see?" 7:12:31 PM GA: "but despite genetics before, and despite acting like it lately, im not the man who raised you and i never will be." 7:12:57 PM GT: "OK." She shrugs again. "You're right. He's gone and he isn't coming back. I figure it's about time to move on." 7:13:47 PM GT: "You're about the closest thing to him, even if you're not exactly him." 7:14:01 PM GA: "that's moving on, but not letting go." 7:14:46 PM GT: "Don't particularly feel like letting go." She threads her arm through his to emphasize her point. "C'monnnn. Pillow forts await." 7:15:08 PM GA: "no. lily, i am not, and never will be, your father, and i am definitely not his substitute." 7:15:59 PM GA: "if anything, we're more like siblings seperated at birth." 7:16:32 PM GT: "Sweet. I can always use more brothers." 7:16:37 PM GT: "Or sisters, as the case may be." 7:17:13 PM GA: "okay, you get my point, you're just doing that thing." 7:17:26 PM GT: She tilts her head. "What thing?" 7:17:37 PM GA: "yeah, uh. im leaving now." 7:18:06 PM GT: "Oh cool!" She walks alongside him. "Where we goin', sisbro?" 7:18:52 PM GA: Dina looks down and sighs, before bursting into laughter. 7:19:31 PM GT: Lily furrows her brow. "What we laughing at." 7:20:13 PM GA: "we're back at my room." 7:20:41 PM GT: "Sweet." She gasps. "Oh man, if we're siblings now, that means we can have SLEEPOVERS." 7:21:37 PM GT: "Do you have popcorn. Can we get popcorn." 7:22:06 PM GT: "I think I've got The Room from when Dad gave it to me as an ironic Christmas present one year." 7:22:59 PM GT: "Do you do makeovers? Aw man, I hope we can do makeovers. I've never had a proper sleepover, do you realize? Never had any friends who were close by enough." 7:23:31 PM GT: She pauses. "O...K, you're being kinda quiet. Everything all right over there?" 7:24:46 PM GA: Dina continues silently staring at the floor for a moment before looking up and smiling. "alright, we can have a makeover, but... what was that about arbitrixes earlier?" 7:25:14 PM GT: "Oh yeah, it kind of just happened. I was bugging Merrow for stabbing privileges because he's doing a stupid thing and I forgot it was your title so I just rolled with it." 7:27:05 PM GA: Dina spins around and her Tandem Hoodie Dress spectacularly changes into the Arbitrix Armor. "well, i am the sheriff around here. constable. head honcho. da chief." She puts on a police hat and flexes her arm while admiring it. "i guess i could show the the ropes." 7:27:21 PM GT: "Aw SHIT yes." 7:27:55 PM GA: She pulls out another had and sticks it on Lily's head. "apprentice chief." 7:28:05 PM GT: "I feel so ~official~." 7:30:45 PM GA: Dina sticks her Laurel of Diana around her own hat to make it a super chief hat, and puts on her Sailor Mercury glasses. 7:30:59 PM GA: Also, holsters her Miranda's Mercy (handcuffs). 7:31:20 PM GA: "we dont have badges but like" 7:31:38 PM GA: She puts a gold star sticker on Lily's jacket or shirt or whatever. 7:31:58 PM GA: And two on her breastplate. 7:32:02 PM GT: "I am the policewoman. It's me." 7:32:23 PM GT: "Our first order of business is clearly to construct the most kickass police department building ever made." 7:33:04 PM GA: "wait but you need a gun" 7:33:50 PM GA: She equpis her Olivetti Over-Underwood. "in the force, we usually have babies like theeeese, but we have a shortage, so you can just-" She puts it away and takes out a default shotgun "-have this one." 7:34:10 PM GA: "i mean i guess i could give you the hot lead hacker, but thats like, a shotgun axe... kinda dangerous..." 7:34:22 PM GT: "I want the shotgun axe." 7:35:17 PM GA: She takes it out. "cause like, when you hit something," And hits the wall. It immediately explodes backwards and nearly takes Dina's head off, before Dina takes control. "yeah it does that." 7:35:31 PM GT: "I NEED THE SHOTGUN AXE." 7:36:40 PM GA: "i would be an idiot... to let a ROOKIE have such high-quality equipment before her first case. gosh." 7:36:54 PM GA: "also, we're low on detectives so you're both a rookie cop and a rookie detective." 7:37:27 PM GT: "Hey, I've got +3 Investigate." She strikes a pose. "Best eyes on the Base." 7:37:46 PM GA: "actually notice is in charge of your eyes" 7:37:59 PM GT: "Shhhh it's an expression." 7:39:01 PM GT: "All I'm saying is I should be a lieutenant at LEAST." 7:39:06 PM GT: "Or however this works." 7:42:25 PM GA: "listen here missy, ive been in the force for five... six years? wait, we started in like... october 2013, and its like... shit, is it march? goddamnit everyone forgot my birthday again- anyway, im going to get called out for nepotism, and we dont just HAND OUT POSITIONS over here in MY RESPECTABLE CONSTABULARY." She starts building her pillow office. 7:46:31 PM GT: She takes some pillows and joins in. "Dude, if you have some broom handles we could make some sick physics-defying antechambers 7:46:35 PM GT: ." 7:46:53 PM GA: "ive got some... axe handles?" 7:47:19 PM GA: "ooh, and duct tape. we could attach some of this stuff to the walls and ceiling." 7:48:02 PM GT: "Oh holy shit yes. This is going to be the raddest pillow fort EVER." 7:48:50 PM GA: "wait a minute" 7:49:12 PM GA: "oh man, if jack is back, then that totally WAS plausibly my heart he said he ripped out and gave me for valentines last year" 7:49:27 PM GT: "Uh. OK?" 7:49:53 PM GA: "sorry i was just thinking about how we could put my skull on here from my severed head jack gave me for christmas" 7:50:25 PM GT: "Haha oh my God. Let's do it. Give the place a proper aura of menace." 7:51:51 PM GA: Dina pulls out a skull that probably doesn't even smell bad because it's been rotting for so long and duct tapes it to the wall. 7:52:00 PM GA: "but what if we come back and someones cleaned it up? and threw it all out?" 7:52:24 PM GT: "The skull will protect it. It's a good luck charm." 7:52:41 PM GA: "nah ive got a better idea" 7:52:48 PM GA: "HEADLESS ZOMBIE FRIEND!" 7:53:07 PM GA: Dina uncaptchalogues headless zombie friend and duct tapes him to the wall. 7:53:13 PM GA: decaptchalogues? 7:53:19 PM GT: "Haha what." 7:53:45 PM GT: "Why do you have so many of your own body parts." 7:53:53 PM GA: "my mutilated corpse plus my brain plus my severed head equals HEADLESS ZOMBIE FRIEND!!!" 7:54:10 PM GA: Headless zombie friend simply gurgles. 7:54:31 PM GA: "people keep giving them to me!" 7:54:35 PM GT: "I love him." 7:55:02 PM GT: "He is my friend now. We will have glorious zombie adventures together." 7:55:12 PM GA: "duuude hes everyones friend." 7:55:30 PM GA: She pulls the skuill off of the wall and sticks it on his empty neck. 7:55:34 PM GA: And tapes it. 7:55:42 PM GT: "Amazing." 7:55:45 PM GA: "now he's just zombie friend" 7:56:01 PM GA: She also puts a dunce cap on him. 7:56:06 PM GA: And a flower crown on that dunce cap. 7:56:12 PM GA: And tapes it too. 7:56:37 PM GT: ((I know what I'm spriting next)) 7:56:43 PM GA: (( already done )) 7:56:56 PM GA: (( partially )) 7:56:56 PM GT: ((> : O)) 7:57:25 PM GA: (( http://prntscr.com/6c0h3p )) 7:58:05 PM GT: "Does he ever, like, get hungry?" 7:58:42 PM GA: She hugs him. "no, no, he's friends. i love you, headless zombie frRRIEAAAAAAAGH AAAAAAGH HE'S EATING ME" 7:58:57 PM GA: "heheh, just kidding, he's only hugging back." 8:00:25 PM GT: "Aw. He's pretty cute for a rotting pile of undead flesh." 8:00:55 PM GA: Dina starts sticking gold stars all over his skull and suit. 8:01:00 PM GA: While still in his grasp. 8:01:36 PM GA: "we should really get him out of these ripped clothes and into something cleaner." 8:01:48 PM GT: "Wait wait wait OK I have to take a picture of this." She pulls out her smartphone. 8:02:22 PM GA: Dina smiles for the camera. "say cheese, parenthesis open headless parenthesis close zombie friend!!" 8:02:54 PM GT: Lily snaps the pic. 8:03:29 PM GT: "Perfect. Save that one for the scrapbook." 8:03:32 PM GA: Dina starts snapping selfies and sending them to Sami and Beau with hashtags like #headlesszombiefriend and #bffsafterdeath 8:03:38 PM GA: Also, to Lily. 8:04:13 PM GA: She squirms out of headless zombie friend's loving grasp. "okay, what outfit do you think he should have?" 8:04:35 PM GA: "he's missing some organs, both external and internal, because null is a creep, so we can take his clothes off safely." 8:04:57 PM GT: "Hmmmm." She considers. "Maybe put him in a lovely shimmering ball gown?" 8:05:20 PM GA: "uh, i only had some of beaus and i gave those to sami." 8:05:59 PM GA: "though, wait... i do have a princess serenity one that would fit 13 year old me." 8:06:26 PM GT: "Aw shiiiiit, yeah. Fuckin do it." 8:06:35 PM GT: "I'll help hold him still." 8:07:43 PM GA: Dina starts taping his hands and legs down while sliding him into the dress. "shit yes. oh my god. this is such a good idea. dress doesn't even fit me any more anyway. heck yes." 8:08:01 PM GA: "second contender was that blue and yellow mystery suit i have" 8:08:42 PM GT: "Dude, how do you have so many cool outfits. I want cool outfits." 8:09:15 PM GA: "alchemy. not the princess serenity one, though, i had that before. also, i was super fucking rich, i have a million suits." 8:09:37 PM GA: "i only bothered tailoring the ones i liked when i got older, though, so a lot no longer fit. mostly the boring ones." 8:09:45 PM GT: "All I've got is my standard outfit. The story's no good if the main character just wears the same outfit all through the series." 8:10:48 PM GA: Dina wardobifies into (( http://cdn-www.cracked.com/articleimages/dan/schemes/fmpyba.jpg / http://prntscr.com/6c0lpg )) 8:11:11 PM GA: "yeah, you're really starting to smell. like i didnt want to say anything, but" 8:11:32 PM GA: "i mean even if im just wearing boring suits i still change three times a day" 8:12:17 PM GT: "Hey, when the end of the world comes, you pack the important stuff, not a change of clothes." 8:12:55 PM GA: "pff, oooobviously." 8:12:58 PM GT: "Do you realize how many key manuscripts got saved because I only packed underwear?" 8:13:50 PM GA: "i... what?" 8:14:05 PM GT: "The answer is a lot." 8:14:18 PM GA: "oh i getcha" 8:14:23 PM GA: "but your room is like, right over there" 8:14:46 PM GA: "my whole house came in, but it was destroyed so i dont know if the library made it." 8:15:01 PM GT: "But I had to move all my stuff from my OLD room into there. I couldn't bring everything." 8:15:19 PM GA: "though most of it was underground. and i think our private underground internet databases survived, so they'd have them." 8:15:41 PM GT: She looks of into the distance. "Wax Abraham Lincoln, you will not be forgotten." 8:15:52 PM GA: "i had one of those too!" 8:16:22 PM GA: "and a medusa head, though that shoots napalm at people..." 8:16:35 PM GT: "Oh shit, really? They must be, like, long lost wax cousins or something!" 8:17:09 PM GA: "yeah i had like, a whole wax museum? and a normal museum. and a paranormal museum!" 8:17:37 PM GT: "Ohhhhh my god. You have to take me to your house someday." 8:18:04 PM GA: "yeahhhh it kind of was destroyed by salt and razor tornados." 8:18:13 PM GA: "everyone nearly died." 8:18:27 PM GA: "i only go there as a mind ghost, to talk to the escaryogi now." 8:18:53 PM GA: "and never to my house. they're always harping on forgetting the physical world and it's restrains and materialistic values avatar chakra style." 8:19:01 PM GT: "Oh what the FUCK." Lily pouts. "Why does everything I wish for die." 8:19:18 PM GA: "cause youre not a hope person" 8:19:41 PM GT: "Also escarwhats." 8:20:12 PM GA: "big mind slug dudes. always talk in questions. helped me realize the avatar st- i mean my page powers?" 8:20:36 PM GT: Her eyes widen. "They know about Mind abilities?" 8:20:48 PM GT: "And, like, teach you how to use them?" 8:21:05 PM GA: "yes, and page ones too. but they are. soooooo. annoying. and you need to have like the most patience in the world." 8:21:12 PM GT: "Dude." 8:21:20 PM GT: "DUDE." 8:21:29 PM GA: "luckily, i can avert the 'stupid student doesnt listen to yoda at first' trope, if that is one." 8:21:37 PM GT: "YOU NEED TO TAKE ME TO THEM LIKE RIGHT NOW." 8:22:03 PM GA: "well, it's kind of a long journey and really deadly?" 8:22:18 PM GT: "Don't care, I'll just mind ghost." 8:22:24 PM GA: "if you were to master the mind ghost thing you could pop in whenever you want, but im not sure if seers can do such a thing.." 8:22:35 PM GA: "because mind ghosts move at the speed of thought. which is super fast." 8:22:57 PM GT: She looks awkward. "Well, I mean, uh... we won't know until I try?" 8:23:47 PM GA: "nah, you might need +5 to do such a thing. we could just get a space player, or, hell, you could ask libby to portal you over since the best one sucks..." 8:24:14 PM GA: "and even then it might just be a page thing. since i did get it as soon as i god tiered." 8:24:50 PM GT: "Ahhhh, come on, at least let me try it out! I'm pretty savvy with Mind stuff, yanno." 8:25:22 PM GT: "I figured out how to jack senses like no problem." 8:25:43 PM GA: "oh, and you might have to have been to a place physically before you can just mind teleport there. and quite frankly, i have no idea where the ark is relative to us right now." 8:26:22 PM GA: "i mean i could just use my omniscience pen at any moment but im saving it for finales" 8:27:02 PM GT: "Ech. Guess I'm stuck here until I can persuade Libby then." 8:27:30 PM GT: "That sucks, I could use some Mind tips right now." 8:27:54 PM GA: "its not exactly urgent. ill introduce you to them someday." 8:28:43 PM GA: "i might have to be there in case you lose your temper. they are VERY, very annoying and have huge sticks tightly stuck right up their sluggy asses." 8:30:02 PM GT: "Seems urgent to me. I need every advantage I can get, right? Especially with Jack on the loose." 8:30:31 PM GA: "oh my god, do not try anything mindy on him he will kill you instantly" 8:30:54 PM GA: "also, im like just kind of wondering, are you still faking the cheery friendliness?" 8:32:20 PM GT: "That depends. Are you going to start faking the cold emotionlessness again?" 8:32:36 PM GA: "no" 8:33:17 PM GA: "im having fun and you seem to be better" 8:33:54 PM GT: "Then I think I can manage to keep things genuine on my end too." Her face grows serious, and she jabs her chest. "And don't EVER pull that shit again." 8:34:55 PM GA: "well dont YOU" She pokes Lily back. "do THAT again. AND YOU." She pokes headless zombie friend. "you're doing great" 8:35:34 PM GT: "He really is." 8:38:15 PM GA: Dina pulls out a fashionable sash and writes 'headless zombie friend : )' on it, then puts it on headless zombie friend. 8:39:07 PM GT: "Can we make him the chief of police." 8:39:36 PM GA: "what? im chief! he can be my hot secretary." 8:39:58 PM GA: "or deputy chief." 8:40:10 PM GA: "administrative secretary?" 8:40:20 PM GT: "What, no, I'm deputy chief. Make him secretary." 8:40:28 PM GA: "youre a rookie!" 8:43:25 PM GA: "you can be my lieutenant. of criminal investigations, special ops, and uniform patrol." 8:43:36 PM GT: "I can accept this." 8:43:52 PM GT: "Headless zombie friend stays secretary, though." 8:44:19 PM GA: "administrative secretary is actually above lieutenants" 8:44:42 PM GT: "OK then make him...private secretary or something." 8:45:29 PM GA: "well, actually, i think theres also a captain rank thats above lieutenant..." 8:48:35 PM GT: "I am captain then. It is me." 8:49:11 PM GA: "uh, no." 8:49:16 PM GT: "Yes." 8:49:37 PM GA: "you havent had one case, youre barely a lieutenant." 8:49:45 PM GA: "keep talking back and you're down to a sergeant." 8:51:18 PM GT: "Noooooooo. Why must you hurt me in this way, fa - sibling of mineeeeee." 8:52:37 PM GT: "I will be the best lieutenant, just you watch. The BEST." 8:57:06 PM GA: Dina draws a poster and tapes it to the wall next to headless zombie friend. http://prntscr.com/6c10v4 8:57:39 PM GA: "there. a proper chain of command." 8:57:47 PM GT: "> : O" 8:57:56 PM GT: "How DARE." 8:57:59 PM GA: "by the way, the herald is in it too, but he's a loose cannon, a total maverick, and i dunno where he is" 8:58:07 PM GA: "you JUST joined the force like five minutes ago" 8:58:20 PM GT: "I'm calling the union." 8:58:32 PM GA: "im head of the union" 8:58:49 PM GT: "I'm disbanding the union." 8:59:28 PM GA: "you're not going to get a good case im court anyway considering in both the judge and all of the lawyers and also you havent had a single cop duty yet" 8:59:52 PM GA: "and i know thats like technically a conflict of interest but" 9:00:04 PM GA: "...youd have to take it to court" 9:00:58 PM GT: "God damn it, this is unfair. You've got a monopoly on the system, how am I supposed to compete." 9:01:16 PM GA: "compete??" 9:02:47 PM GT: "Well, obviously I've gotta work my way up the ranks, undermining your oppressive yoke in the meantime, and then defeat you in a climactic final battle, thus ensuring my place as the very villain I sought to destroy." 9:02:54 PM GT: "Or something, I don't know." 9:04:08 PM GA: "thats it! im sick and tired of making excuses for you! youre an embarrassment to the department! you're off the case and off the force. your badge, your gun, now." 9:05:01 PM GT: "GASSSSSSP." She rips the star sticker off her chest and throws it at her feet. "You can't fire me, I QUIT!" 9:05:10 PM GT: "And you never even gave me a gun." 9:06:00 PM GA: "good, now i dont have to fill out all that paperwork and probably something about taxes and paying you for laying you off or something." 9:06:16 PM GA: "did i not? i swear i was going to give you the one i duped from nate originally" 9:06:49 PM GA: "though i doubt you have shotgunkind anyway" 9:07:09 PM GT: "Yeah, no, I don't have a ton of specibi." 9:07:20 PM GT: "God damn it, I wanted that shotgun axe though." 9:07:28 PM GA: "i haaave... axekind, hatkind, shotgunkind, chumpkind, and evidencekind." 9:07:38 PM GA: "you can have the normal shotgun?" 9:07:46 PM GA: "axe is off limits tho." 9:08:14 PM GT: "Too late, you kicked me off the force, remember?" 9:10:44 PM GA: "huh? oh, uh, 'yyou threatened civilians, wrecked three squaad cars, started a public disturbance in a night clubb, blackmailed a librarian, threw the head of the city council into a lake, destroyed the hope diamond, dropped the destroyed diamond shards into a neaby volcano after tripping on your flip flop's shoelaces, destroyed my yacht's propellors, hit me in the eye with a champagne cork, left a virus on the mint's computer in an attempt to increase speed, unleashed all the inmates from the asylum, set three buildings on fire, knocked four down, locked the mayor in his own building... and saved The President's Daughter from terrorists." 9:11:04 PM GA: "welcome back to the force, rookie." 9:11:21 PM GA: "heres your gun and badge back." Dina hands over the basic shotgun and gives her a new sticker. 9:11:36 PM GT: "I will wear it with pride." 9:11:47 PM GT: "And try not to shoot too many people." 9:12:25 PM GA: "yeah, dont... like, dont shoot anybody. you dont have a license to kill yet." 9:12:48 PM GA: "ooh, we also have a secret spy sector based on the remnants of the cia and fbi that im head of malory archer style" 9:18:28 PM GA: Dina untapes headless zombie friend from his special secretary spot and captchalogues him. "get comfy, hzf, we're going on cop business soon." 9:18:40 PM GA: But not before taking a bunch more selfies with him in his new pretty dress. 9:20:03 PM GT: "Heyyyy, I want in too. Budge over." She smushes in next to her. 9:20:54 PM GA: They get all the selfies with big h. She also collects the skull and hat, but leaves the department and chain of command sign. 9:21:13 PM GA: "i am so sending these pics to like all the vets" 9:21:53 PM GA: "eh, well, ill send them to like, sami, beau, ryspor, not nate. im not talking to him. ooh, maenam, she'd like this weird question mark suit im wearing." 9:22:21 PM GT: "Why you not talking to Nate? Did he go batshit insane on you or something?" 9:22:26 PM GT: "He does that." 9:22:55 PM GA: "huh? no, he just hasnt texted me in forever." 9:23:05 PM GA: "so im secretly mad at him. for not doing that." 9:23:12 PM GA: "hes been texting SAMI." 9:23:20 PM GA: "but not me." 9:25:13 PM GT: She nods sympathetically. "Simply horrible." 9:25:26 PM GT: "You tried telling him that instead of being all passive-aggressive about it?" 9:25:52 PM GA: "no, im just gonna like break up with him or something. he barely even wants to be in a relationship anyway." 9:26:07 PM GA: "clearly." 9:28:55 PM GT: "Clearly." 9:35:41 PM GA: Dina coughs after an awkward silence. "...anyway, uh. good work, rookie, you'll make a fine officer yet." 9:37:14 PM GA: "wanna watch some 80s buddy cop movies in the punchbutt police department break room?" 9:37:31 PM GT: "More than life itself." 9:37:40 PM GT: ((then they did the thing the end)) 9:38:01 PM GA: (( fade 2 blapck ))